I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
