Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
