At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I use my feet as sexual weapons
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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