lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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