I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
