Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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