someone get that fucking seahorse.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
