that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
