You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
