How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Is it because I queefed?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
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