Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
