i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
