I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
