I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
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