Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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