Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
how drunk are you?
Several
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
