Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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