So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
