If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
