Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
