How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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