Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Randomize
