He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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