Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I'm always down for nudity.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
