Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
You have to summon your inner elephant
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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