I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
