So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
My bed smells like the plague
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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