The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
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