So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
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