This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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