maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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