Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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