Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
