that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
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