How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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