the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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