he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
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