I feel like I'm in dance class right now
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
