Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
