and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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