dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Randomize
