I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Randomize
