I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
