i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize