Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
