ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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