I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
