oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
