i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
