babies were throwing up all over the place
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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